


I'll sing to him, each spring to him

by bchekov



Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: (who wouldn't), Brief Anxiety Mention, M/M, Pre-Relationship, dirk lowkey swooning, todd playing the guitar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-01
Updated: 2018-03-01
Packaged: 2019-03-25 10:10:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13831980
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bchekov/pseuds/bchekov
Summary: Slightly lost, and unwilling to admit it, he stumbles across the living room. About to enter he sees Todd on one of the couches, gently strumming his guitar as he sings softly, and stops. Dirk immediately recognizes it to be Radiohead.





	I'll sing to him, each spring to him

Dirk wakes with a jolt. He’s breathing hard but that’s all there is to it. He almost smiles out of relief. He hasn’t had a nightmare in days now, which is surprising as they- being him, Todd and Farah- have been staying at the Spring mansion for nearly a week and unfamiliar places tends to trigger his anxiety which in turn triggers nightmares. He’s grateful.

He blinks at the ceiling and takes his time to even out his breathing. He glances at the clock on the nightstand and sighs.

_ 3:02 _

“Might as well get up,” he mumbles to himself, climbing out of bed and embracing for the cold. “doesn’t look like I’m gonna get anymore sleep tonight...”

Making his way to the kitchen for some tea, he takes time to stop and look at the various photographs he passes. They seem to mostly consist of the Spring family before Catherine’s death; he only spots two that are taken after it and they both feature Farah and Lydia, with a noticeable lack of Patrick. It makes his heart ache a little.

Slightly lost, and unwilling to admit it, he stumbles across the living room. About to enter he sees Todd on one of the couches, gently strumming his guitar as he sings softly, and stops. Dirk immediately recognizes it to be Radiohead. He only knows a few songs, and this isn’t one of them, but Todd has a tendency to sing certain artists in certain ways and the slightly lower tone of voice suggests Radiohead.

Todd amazing like that, Dirk thinks.

“ __ My fake plastic love  
__ But I can’t help the feeling  
_ I could blow through the ceiling  
_ __ If I just turn and run. ”

It’s rather sad, he realizes, but it’s also strangely soothing. (he pushes away the thought that it might just be because it’s  _ Todd _  singing it.) He takes a few step back, hoping the dark will conceal him even though the chances of Todd already having notices him are high. It makes him feel a little guilty since it’s obviously a private moment, but he can’t seem to tear his eyes away.

“ __ And if I could be who you wanted  
__ If I could be who you wanted  
_ All the time  
_ __ All the time”

He finishes quietly, letting the chord fade naturally.

“You know,” he says, loudly. “you’re not exactly discreet.” he turns to face him. He looks exhausted, Dirk notices.

He shrugs and smiles guiltily when he meets Todd’s eyes.

“Sorry. Didn’t want to interrupt.”

Todd returns the smile. “It’s fine.” he scoots to the side and motions to the empty space with his eyes. It takes Dirk a beat to understand what he means before making his way over and taking the seat. Despite the size of the room the couch is quite small so their upper arms brush at the slightest movement. “Couldn’t sleep?”

“Not exactly, but something like it.” Dirk replies. Todd nods, looking down at his guitar. Dirk hadn’t realized he was still playing, or rather, he was just plucking strings, but it was music nonetheless. Embarrassed at how easily distracted he is, he clears his throat. “What about you? You look like you haven’t slept in a week.”

Todd laughs lightly. “I  _ feel  _ like i haven’t slept in a week, if i’m being honest.” he leans back and closes his eyes. “I dunno why but I haven’t been able to sleep more than a few hours at a time for these past, what, five days? Maybe it’s the case that’s keeping me on edge.”

Even though he knows he shouldn’t, he feels bad about having slept better than in literal  _ months  _ the past week. “Maybe,” he agrees and hopes it’s just that. He has a sneaking suspicion it’s not though, eerily similar to a hunch, but without the pulling feeling.

Briefly, he considers it’s because he’s beside the subject but drops it immediately. Nothing good comes from overthinking things he aren’t even sure what are.

Silence settles over the two, and after minutes of it, Dirk begins to wonder if the other has fallen asleep. His hand that was resting on the neck of the guitar has dropped to the couch and the other is limply holding the strings; his breathing is barely audible, coming out in soft puffs from between chapped lips. Dirk almost cries because of how adorable it looks.

Wincing a little, he sees how awkwardly positioned Todd’s neck is and he  _ knows _  it’s gonna hurt tomorrow if nothing is done. It physically pains him as he’s almost completely certain this is the only sleep he’s gotten that night.

“Todd,” he murmurs, gently shaking his shoulder. “Todd.”

He gets a groan in response and he goddamn nearly  _ shrieks  _ because of how endearing it is.

“You’re gonna hate yourself tomorrow if you continue sleeping like that.” he tries instead. Todd groans again and sits up straight.

“I hate everything.” he grumbles, blinking blearily, and tightens the grip on his guitar.

Dirk pats his shoulder. “I know you do.” he rises and offers a hand. “Let’s head to bed, okay?”

“Ugh.”

It takes them a while, as the place is “fucking huge” as Todd put it, but eventually they arrive at the hallway that leads to their bedrooms, which Dirk hadn’t noticed were that close to each other.

“Night, man.” Todd waves in his direction and reaches for the knob. “Thanks for keeping me company.”

“Hey,” Dirk starts, feeling momentarily courageous.

“Yeah?” Todd meets his eyes and he regrets opening his mouth. He looks so thoroughly  _ drained _  that it makes his chest tightens. He shouldn’t take advantage of someone so worn out.

_ Wanna sleep in my bed, tonight, with me? It might help. _  “Nothing,” he says instead, feeling rather awful. “Good night, Todd.”

“Good night, Dirk.”

The door closes and Dirk barely sleeps the rest of their stay.

**Author's Note:**

> the song todd was singing: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n5h0qHwNrHk
> 
> title taken from the song bewitched, bothered and bewildered (covered by samuel barnett among others)


End file.
